Breaking Bad
The irony of modern culture is horrifying. Most of us manipulate language so we can avoid being confronted by our own conscience. Most of us now traffic in the language that lawyers, politicians, and HR reps use to obfuscate the truth in an attempt to avoid accountability. The thing that we are learning the hard way is: no one has ever escaped their conscience; not ever. That is the horrifying irony.
The flaw in that strategy of linguistic manipulation is the misunderstanding of the meaning of “accountability.” In the corporate world and in the cultural narrative, accountability is an external process. “We need to hold people accountable.” That’s not how accountability works. You can deliver consequences, and then someone can take accountability or not. Plenty of people continue to point the finger for their own misdeeds, even after consequences have been rendered.
Accountability is an internal process that takes place when you are confronted by your conscience. Your conscience is the voice that calls on you to be your most authentic, most courageous, most extraordinary self, and calls you out when you fall short. When your conscience calls you out for your shortcomings, that is shame. Shame is the birthplace of accountability. When someone refuses to take accountability for their errors and misdeeds, the question “Have you no shame?” will often come up.
The answer is “No.” Most of us don’t have any shame, because the modern, social contract says that we all agree to turn a blind eye to the fact that everyone uses linguistic manipulation to avoid shame and accountability. “I won’t call attention to your lack of integrity, if you agree not to call attention to mine.”
Once again, the flaw with that strategy is that no one can escape their conscience. The bill always comes due. Do you want that reckoning on your deathbed when you’re too old and too frail to make amends?
This isn’t about preaching. I’m not on my high horse, because I am no exception. I can’t escape my conscience either. Shaming me for the decisions and actions that are beneath my character is the proper function of my conscience too. Manipulating language in a futile attempt to avoid shame and accountability that have been earned through poor judgement is beneath me, so I need to stop doing it. I need to set my conscience up for success by speaking precisely and speaking with integrity.
The change is not easy, but the decision is simple. No one can escape their conscience. Look at all of the haters and villains that you’ve met. Why do they behave that way? Because they’re being torn apart from the inside by their conscience. They are filled with regret and resentment because their refusal to follow their conscience has delivered nothing but despair. How could it be otherwise? Look at the compelling villains in movies and TV: Tony Soprano, Walter White, Don Draper, and Tom Wambsgans. They all symbolize the same dynamics.
The inevitability of the confrontation with your conscience is a cold, hard fact. So, you can set your conscience up for success, or you can set yourself up for despair and self-destruction. You have the freedom to make your decision, and that decision determines your destiny.
Faith, audacity, and integrity, or regret, resentment, and despair?
Own your decisions. Own your days. Own your destiny.